World Startled By Fact That Pets Turn Into People Once Their Owners Leave The House
The Threat of Ever-Rising Population Causes Many To Stay At Home
February 8, 2020
Alien Invasion Fails!
Four Inch Tall Extraterrestrials Find Conquest To Difficult To Accomplish!
March 18, 2055
Transformers 4 Wins Best Picture!
Remarkably Poignant Brawling Robot Epic Awarded With Cinema’s Highest Honor!
March 2, 2015
Zombie Apocalypse Averted By Logic
Millions Angered By Countless Hours Planning For Nothing
April 16, 2017
Ain’t Gonna Need To Tell The Truth, Tell No Lies
Everything You Think, Do And Say Is In The Pill You Took Today
January 1, 3535
Cancellation Of My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic Causes Mass Hysteria!
Bronies Forced To Look Elsewhere For Examples To Prove Open-Mindedness
June 11, 2012
Renowned Newsprinter Fired for Hilarious Ghost Joke
WHO’LL MAKE PUNS NOW YOU IDIOTS? I MADE THE NEWS PEOPLE WON’T BUY ANYTHING FROM YOU!
October 18, 2035
Ghosts Extinct
Last Ghost Dies In Captivity, The New Addition To The Animal Kingdom Didn’t Have A Ghost Of A Chance
October 17, 2035
